small addition

the oak pollinator summed holy week quite well

take notice: no egg dying, chocolate bunnies or pastel plaids

definately the the most memorable week-long observance i have ever been a part of.

out of simplicity, i'll only add:

+ palms - i praise and kill Jesus with them.
+ figs - don't like the word "cursed." mark bookends temple-clearing w/ fig story.
+ politics - Jesus feared no one but God (see Romero).
+ misunderstood mary - we too feel that way among disciples.
+ chimay - for a "golden" display of servanthood, thank you greg.
+ elijah - he gets a seat at the table.
+ rain - weather very symbolic of weekend events.
+ peter & timothy - see how the homeless love one another.


elegant. simple. pure. profound.

"Define yourself in 2 sentences."

I thought for a brief second, then once I remembered again, I breathed. My mind ran to catch up with my now quickly beating heart. No way this question could cause me so much physiological trauma. This wasn’t just a question of what my purpose in life was, this is what is my “definition.” Crap – my life is hard enough right now trying to figure out what the hell I’m doing here, trying to find a job, losing money, wading through not "feeling" joy much of the time, what in my life is going along with my definition of myself?

Could this question really be this hard? Wait – A sojourner – that’s good: I’m wandering in a land that is not my own. No – dumb. I think – New Testament - to Paul and his continual reminder to himself and others to be “in Christ.” His identity was nothing apart from that of Christ. But is that really his definition? Besides – would he write that on an application for employment. I doubt it. It’s so esoteric that one would be laughed at or thought of as a snob to write such a thing. So, what do I write?

I sat. Thinking… Questioning…

Am I what I do? Am I what I read/ think/ act/ say? Am I the sum of my parts? Am I who I am? Am I just defined as a person? A person with thoughts, feelings, emotions, behaviors? Is this question asking what is my definition now and what do I want it to be in the future? Do they even care what I write here? How honest of an answer do they want? Maybe I’m making this too complex, but I couldn’t help it – it rattled me.

I revert back to the Pauline school of thought. If my identity is in Christ, what do I define myself as? Am I anything apart from Him? What does that mean to the world? How can the “outside” world understand the “insider” language of “I am a disciple of Christ?” They simply can’t – I have a hard enough time trying to understand that and live it out practically.

Back to Sean, defined…

Jesus is Jesus. I would like to be, but am, well... not. But I want to be... I want to be solely known for my Christ-like life, and nothing else. And it just so happens that my Christ-like life is lived out within the defined talents and abilities with which God graced me. Thus – I’m not Jesus, I’m Sean, but I have Jesus within me guiding me to live like he did. I’m not perfect but I’m trying to do as well as I can. I’m not sure what life has for me, but I’m asking for help. Man, my life is pitiful – Unlike others in the world, I got nothing figured out, I’m just a lost kid trying to find a way through the jungle. I am nothing apart from Christ. I can’t help it: I’m bankrupt without him. He is reason for living as well as dying, so how do I define myself when my life and breath come from outside myself? I ended up simply settling on this:

“I am a work in progress.”

God only knows if I’ll get the job, but… I think most people can understand that definition. Hopefully the world sees me as walking “the way” towards something (Someone), but at the same time journeying with them amidst a life we rarely understand.

foreshadowing

Preparing for planting is not an easy task. The soil must be right before the seeds will grow. The trash and huge rocks must be removed. The ground must be tilled and fertilized. The rain must come and water the dry soil. The earthworms must move-in and work their magic. The rows must be finely tuned. The soil is now ready.

Today – we finally planted the beginnings of the GOG (Garden at Oak Grove). Transferring the flowers, tomato and jalapeño plants, basil, clove and oxalis proved to be a joyful adventure. The “work” of planting quickly became the hope of the future. We were all excited for the plants to grow and hopefully yield a small crop. The preparation, when met with possibility of growth, becomes totally worth it. Though only the beginning as seeds and small plants now find their place in the ground, we will continue to work the land and provide for the crop. And the Lord will make it grow.

Today, I couldn’t help but think of the upcoming fall. As we prepare for “a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor,” no doubt that the initial planting will be joyfully hopeful as our present preparation meets the future possibility of watching God grow the seed.

it's been 3 days

empty tomb!
happy people!
share the
good news!

from modernity to sanskrit

The sapling waits. The dry season surrounds him with cracked soil, cheap top soil blown by the strong wind that slaps his young bark. His little budding leaves shift slightly, wincing from the pain. He has watches as a couple of other saplings sprout huge leaves in only a short time, seemingly unhindered by the drought, while his own branches just slightly elongate and thicken, partially budding. Under the surface the dry ground forces his roots deep beneath the soil, searching for water and nutrients. The small sapling longs for the sun to stop scorching his branches. He enjoys the shade provided late in the day by the large old oak a little ways off. The old oak noticed the sapling shaking, beaten by the extended dry season. “Roots. Roots” was all he said. The sapling waved what few buds he had as a thank you. He began to relax in the wind, allowing his roots to sustain him.

subdued by genius

To the Creators of AVP-

The director Paul W.S. Anderson accomplished the unthinkable, outdoing himself even after the amazing success of Mortal Kombat, Event Horizon and Resident Evil.

I salute you and thank you for realizing the educational and alluring potentiality found in both the mixture concerning the pre-historical mysticism of origins as well as the tribal lure of epic battles. It would have never crossed my mind to consider that human existence is under girded by a longstanding tradition of dreadlocked warrior-predators who shield the earth from human-sacrificing, earth-overtaking, multiple-mouth-biting, uglier-than-sin aliens who reside beneath Antarctica.

But you did it. Somehow you created a landmark picture in the history of cinema that fulfills a highly needed niche by crossing the genre of sci-fi, action, drama, and historical docu-narrative. Simply amazing really. Like the chest-popping eggs planted by the “Queen-Bee” alien, you have single-handedly birthed a renewed life within me. Knowing that one can write a script in which there is no impetus for a first plot point within the first two minutes of the movie, even the most ridiculous dialogue doesn’t matter, and many characters really can die without me caring as long as there is a clash between two hideously strong superhuman powers underneath the dredges of the earth - all the while, protecting humanity better than any government could ever do, inspires me to sleep peacefully as an aspiring film-maker and citizen of Earth.

On behalf of the average to slightly below average movie-goers/renters everywhere, we owe you big for this picture. Thanks again to all those who helped make the vision of Alien V. Predator into a reality we all can enjoy.

Protected by the Predator-
a lowly film major


(yes, this was the premier flick on the huge OG big screen)

"delicate flower"

Solid plaid cup contains morning brew - ceramic
Solid table upholding my elbow – wood
Solid chair pushing back on my bum – Wood/padded
Solid silicon shaping my seeing – Window
Solid wall standing blocking view, retaining heat – composite mixture, insulated, dry – wall

Solid then gives way to sexy writhing potted scenery
Compost black speckled white dirt insulating roots unseen
Sucking life from darkness, grasping stability
Shoot forth stem green, thin, strong
Pushing skyward future possibility
Photosynthetic eurythmic lyric, poetic form
Authenticate top transparency
Culminating validation, sensation more than meets the eye or nose –
Sits amidst soul
Icing upon natural budding beauty
A bulbous delicate strength, weeping tenderly

Though not with me, with you - Read
Between the lines, don’t simply look
At the drama unfolding before you die
Sun hits the eye of the beholder opened
Splendor shone
Beating a pulse of alter reality
Only upon perceiving simple complexity
Realistically reminding, of everything
The epicenter we are not

This leaf enough for me to belief, in
More than a higher power, a God who concerns
Who peaces and keeps in tender care
Who graces the proud in humility
Who more than simply sustains, reins
Who more than plants, he rains, shines, tills, and harvests
The ultimate love:
A purple tip tulip
Blessing a morn’s coffee sip

monk business, that's all

The sun came just before noon after several gloomy, grey days. Beckoned out of the house, two amateur gardeners began to clean up weeds, leaves, and the muck build-up in the soon-to-be herb garden. The rake, the ho, the shovel were the tools of the day. The ground a partner, not an adversary. A slight sweat amidst the midday labor. A solidarity with monks of old that centered around the freedom of working in prayerful harmony with God’s creation. Thoughts began to clear like the dark, wet ground underfoot. Doubts, insecurity, anxiety became soaked up by a clarity of purpose. Unable to fully put into words what my time here was for, besides personal maturation, I struck an unanticipated iceberg of purpose: a planting requires preparation.

Oak Grove exists, on a basic level, to facilitate growth, to enrich, to inspire, to deepen roots, thicken trunks and lengthen branches. But before any of this can happen, the soil must be ready. Scattering seed upon ill-prepped land leaves seeds worthless and turns work into futility. Not a system or rule, growth is a process that takes time and energy and patience. Like any good planting of the Lord, preparation is required. The planting season begins in the fall. God-willing, he’ll continue to bless me by using me be a blessing. I’m preparing for a planting.

in the words of a bulbously-headed man, "stick this in your pipe and smoke it"

Yoder on The Disciple of Christ and the Way of Jesus

I. The Disciple/Participant and the Love of God
A. Sharing the divine nature as the definition of Christian existence
B. Forgive as God has forgiven you
C. Love indiscriminately as God does

II. The Disciple/Participant and the Life of Christ
A. Being in Christ as the definition of Christian existence
B. Having died with Christ and sharing in his risen life
C. Loving as Christ loved, giving himself
D. Serving as he served
E. Subordination

III. The Disciple/Participant and the Death of Jesus
A. Suffering with Christ as the definition of apostolic existence
B. Sharing in divine condescension
C. Give your life as he did
D. Suffering servanthood in place of dominion
E. Accept innocent suffering without complaint as he did
F. Suffer with or like Christ the hostility of the world, as bearers of the kingdom cause
G. Death is liberation from the power of sin
H. Death is the fate of the prophets; Jesus whom we follow, was already following them
I. Death is victory

“This centering of the apostolic ethic on the disciple’s cross evidences a substantial, binding and sometimes costly social stance… [that is] the political, legally-to-be-expected moral clash with the powers ruling his society… [as] servanthood replace[s] dominion and forgiveness absorb[s] hostility. (The Politics of Jesus pgs. 127-131)”

2.26 - 3.5

the first week in the abbey wasn't limited to but included some of the following (http://oakpollination.blogs.com for some more info):

- morning prayer
- abbey ale
- manual labor
- communion
- observation
- conversation
- indo exercise
- tea/coffee
- ritual dance (to "i got food")
- solitude
- adjustment
- laughter
- visitors/inquisitors

these aspects tangibly shape an indescribably richer, deeper and more beautiful picture of living in true "community" than society or even the church has made it out to be. this be my "churchhome" - no hyphen, no seperation, no gap between faith and life. in only one week, what was only theory before makes great sense. thank you abbots for inviting me inside your lives.

climbing

When scaling a tree, the first branch may sometimes be hard to reach. At times the simple reaching up just isn't enough. The initial height one must overcome may require the help of a simple machine or perhaps the aid of another individual. Overcoming the distance builds confidence for the rest of the journey. Once that first trunk is passed, the options increase and the expedition becomes more of a exercise in choice rather than an obstacle. Which branch will be the most fun or challenging to climb? Do I even want to climb today, or do I have more to do at this particular juncture? One may be a place to stop for rest. Another very well could be a leap away. As the tree becomes one’s personal space of freedom, reaching out to the farthest leaves may be a goal, but not a necessity. One feels at home amidst the grooves of the bark. The smell of wet leaves resonates with the organic creature within. The sound of a cool wind rustling and shaking branches, peaceful – not terrifying. One’s movement becomes integrated into the tree, a outgrowth of the tree’s essential nature.

The hardest part of tree escalation may very well be that first branch.

transition time

There’s people who happily greet me when I return home. That's a big difference. A two year-old runs about the house. Thirty-somethings make me an extra sandwich for lunch and tea in the morning, though I have yet to do anything for them. Twenty-something overwhelmed by the new and fun and a tad awkward and joyful and funny and warm and exciting experience. I’ve slept in the abbey two nights...

More thoughts to come, I’m just too tired to gather all of them right now.