Friday, October 28, 2005

"F"

Foolishness: “Surely now all traditional forms of kingship, of political rule, stand exposed and condemned before the kingship that is exercised in the cross.”

Some would say I’m feeding myself propaganda. Some would say idealism is ridiculous, that we should settle for what we can get based on systemic problems. Some would say go to church and vote republican. Some would say give up. Some would say take your place in the line, because you’re going to die like everyone else. Some would say Jesus was just another one of those guys who tried to change things, but it didn’t matter – he was killed by the man.

Father: “I believe in my heart…”

That some things are worth fighting for… that most of them seem ridiculous, at first… that I refuse to give up what I believe in… that truth is the bread of life…that the marginalized have a lot to say, especially about the skewed view from the center… that there’s more to me and you and our world than simply getting by… that me and you and that world need love…

Fight: “I want you to hit me as hard as you can.”
“What? In the face?”
“Surprise me.”

Evangelicals. Iraq. Suburbia. Skinny pot-bellies. Romero. Heroin. Red power ties. Relativity. Hegemony. Perspective. Fair trade. People trade. HIV. McWorld. Science. Consumerism. Superhighway. Poetry. Enlightenment. Colonialism. Imperial stout. Taxation. Homosexuality. News. Gas. Farmers. Hellenization. Gothic arches. Volkswagen. Ronald Reagan. Iron Curtain. Celts. Subways. Hell. Pink clouds.

Franklin: “Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth.”

An individual who cares to change himself and his small sphere, living in a community that cares to perfect one another and their city, participating with others seeking to better themselves and their worlds: criticizing, releasing, proclaiming, energizing…

Thursday, October 27, 2005

familial sentiments

My mom would hug almost everyone that came into our house when I was kid. Even my friends who had no desire to be hugged and just stood there and got squeezed. My brothers and I always had people over to our house growing up. My dad, though certainly not a hugger, did enjoy being able to provide for a house the people would want to frequent. My friends seemed to enjoy coming over, but my house certainly wasn’t of the keg-throwing party while mom and dad are gone types. Seems like my parents were involved in most things at my house.

The more I think back on it and my experiences in the homes of others, this wasn’t/isn’t that normal. Why did my friends seem to enjoy coming over and playing pool and in the pool and spending the night watching movies, all with my parents not too far away? The only thing that seems to make sense is that my parents loved having people over. But even more than that – they wanted to love the people that came over.

My parents love each other and my brothers very much. This is more than I can say for most of my friends’ experiences growing up in broken homes, houses without any discipline, or total family wrecks. They practically modeled love to me and my friends just about all the time, seeking to serve and be open for hurts and pains, throwing parties and approving of their children’s generally well-mannered social lives. It wasn’t an effort at showing off, nor could me or any of my friends point to it as such. But looking back – love is most certainly what it was/is.

Maybe my inclination and desire to live in a familial community where we throw parties, dine and pray together, look out for one another, enjoy the differences among our friends and attempt to look out for the downtrodden of society stems from the seed of familial beauty in which I grew up as a child. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t always, necessarily like my parents who fought and grounded us and misunderstood our teenage needs. But – it is very true that all of those aspects make a family stronger, not weaker. Covering up the faults reveals the hypocrisy. Never did my family attempt hypocrisy.

The past few months, my roommates have come to feel like family. We eat together, get on each others’ nerves sometimes, have people over, chill out on the deck, are awoken by one another, share struggle and encouragement. This bond serves not only us, but also our Austin-wide, neighborhood web of friends and acquaintances. We all agree that being a family seems to be most similar sense of “relatedness” Jesus talks about as it harkens back to the tribes of Israel. We take part in the small blessing of family together as brothers and sisters in Christ, not for ourselves – but for the mending of a broken world. So much of the world doesn’t understand the family – God’s blessing to us. So it is no surprise that people don’t understand what we do here, and are yet are still drawn to it – to Christ.

Hugging the world, one child at a time. Thanks for the legacy mom and dad.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

today in no order (besides chronological)

- prayed at 6:30 with abbey-dwellers; always a pleasure (especially after several 6am shifts)

- rolled silverware; a new-found delight for my contemplation (especially after rude customers)

- talked about relationships; another aspect of my ministry to women

- conversed under the trees; a chance to share some of my story

- walked around town lake; a good exercise after standing all day (especially with the abbey-couch-dweller/stealer)

- dined with seven; a french meal for remembrance

- you and me and everyone we know; a highly-recommended, chance pick flick from mel

- blogged for the first time in a while; a cloudy mind clearing once again

- sleep, keep, deep - in thine hands tonight.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

a new Catholic mass

What’s weird about a monastic community in the middle of a city?

People seem to think of it as strange and cultish. People see it as a mysterious ancient tradition that they don’t understand. People imagine it as communal, hippie hemp-wearing phenomena. People view it as foreign and cryptic. People judge it…

Until they are invited into it.

Into: asked to participate, rather than simply look on/judge
It: communal rhythm

What’s weird about it is how much this little community has to say about God to the society at large. Christian and not-yet-Christian alike seem to affirm (once participating slightly in our commonality) both in speech and participation that communal life breeds encouragement, challenge, acceptance, and respect for all those involved. The communal life of believers inherently seeks to share and reciprocate itself to everyone, regardless of creed or breed because it is based on the infinite love of God. This boundry-less love flows beyond borders of insider-outsider, nourishing the cracks between us-them.

Maybe what is so weird about communal life lies in the fact that the love of God pulls us together, rather than apart. Maybe what makes a community devoted to God and each other so foreign is the fact that it subverts our natural tendencies towards the selfish love. Maybe what makes our community so weird is God himself, unashamedly present in each of us individually and communally.

What’s so weird about God-fearing people loving holistically?

Newton’s law of gravity says that a larger mass draws a smaller mass to itself. But we still don't know why. So how can this little mass of community cause such a stir, such controversy. Perhaps the why is better explained in a world of possibility - a love that manifests the possibility to imagine. To imagine a renewed future in the present. Just because you don’t like the mass or can't explain it doesn’t mean you won’t be affected by it – or drawn towards it - or just plain sucked in.

What's so weird is maybe this city really could be a blackhole.