wow

this blog represents a definite time of life that lead to where i am now.

i have a child and a coffee shop. both challenge and intrigue me.

rather than write as much as i once did, now i experiment with practical theology.

my family friends and coworkers create a support community that balances me.

pursuing the dream, the grace.

I like blogs

Facebook has become the favorite new toy. It is just so easy to check in on your friends and see what everyone's status is and read about their favorite book, cheese or embarrassing moment. It is a way to create new arguments, check on a resume, or browse self-indulgent pictures self-indulgently.

At least for some people - not all people. I neither despise folks for using Facebook nor frown upon them...

So what am I saying?

I suppose all that I'm really saying is that I prefer blogs. Something written everyone once in a while that updates and reads and shares in a real way. I suppose I'm saying my introversion leads to this type of communication more than casual conversation and BS lists. Even if my cryptic nature of blogging is more often the result of working through things privately and confessing them.

I suppose I'm saying that I wished I wrote here more. I've never changed my blog's name since its inception. What you find here is a logged path. A step towards who I am becoming that has little do with likes and dislikes or photos or even my personality. It is just me revealing little parts of myself to people who actually know me. If anyone should read this blog, please know that I thank you for being my friend. You are valued and live life with me. You know my story and help me continue to live it.

Facebookers - keep up the good work. As for me and my words, we'll use blogs (sometimes :)

Who knows, maybe I'll even post more than one blog this year. Just have to wait and see.

transfiguration sunday

climb the high dive

I can’t sleep tonight wondering what lies ahead…

Pray for doors to open literally into new spaces, new faces, reciprocate God’s graces

Entering into uncharted waters my heart flutters, arms flap, just to keep my head up

And that is enough. Enough for now. Rest may come soon, but not for a while…

a foray into the net again

A mild intro into summer - thus far.
Tonite Schwarz by mine own hand
I decide to write...

This blog is really a little place to catalogue and organize my thoughts. Thoughts, which have been so befuddled that I've tried to distance myself from analyzing and compounding the menutia of life and just relax myself. A large part of that process has been reading the entire Harry Potter series, which I began just after my last post and finished last week. Yep - all six of them... Truly fun to read and eagerly awaiting the 5th movie and 7th book. Geeky if you haven't read them, wonderful if you have.

A movie, one day.
A bar, one day.
Not everything has to (or will) happen now.

The old CM peeps have been making their way out of the woodwork lately to come to the Thursday night Draught Housing... Somethings are amazing. God works in funny ways and brings people together when they need each other the most. Most of the group is insecure about the "future" (ie - the next job they'll have) and feel out of place, disconnected and lonely. Thus the time at the pub has become a chance to just chill wihout having to be cool or act like you have your shit together. A place where people listen and encourage each other. Who'd have thought that after constant invitations for 2 years, sometimes the unexplainable happens and true friendships fight their way past rocky surfaces, superficiality, and into the light of fresh dew - anticipating the new day.

The coffee shop is easier to handle when I remember to see it as an ensemble cast who wear many distinct faces; faces that develop richer colors and deeper wrinkles and bare more scars and shine brighter everytime I learn something new about the people behind that wear them. Genuine routine has a way of bringing people together. (ask the monastics)

I suppose that's all I want to say for now.

What started as a "Top 5 Jack Bauer Tributes" list...

Quickly escalated to an all-out Jack Bauer playlist:

Killing the in Name of - Rage Against the Machine
Under Pressure - Queen
Running with the Devil - Van Halen
Carry That Weight - The Beatles
Shot in the Arm - Wilco
Bad - Michael Jackson
What the World Needs Now is Love - Burt Bacharach
Dead or Alive - Bon Jovi
I Shot a Man in Reno Just to Watch Him Die - Johnny Cash
Anything for Love - Meatloaf
Blowin' in the Wind - Bob Dylan
Loner - Neil Young

Good Friday and other (smaller) ridiculous things

today the garbage man snickered at me. yes, there are garbage men. so no i'm not using that term in a derogatory way. it is simply one example of the many stares, smirks and smiles that i get while mowing the lawn.

yes, i use an old-school rotary mower. yes, i'm fine with that. no, it isn't easy. but i do it out of ethos far more than enjoyment. as i mow and contemplate the ridiculousness of this choice to enjoy the toil of using a technologically ancient tool, i'm often reminded of the poet, farmer, critic, and hopeful Christian philospher - wendell berry. of course my life on so many levels is far too "sophisticated" to even associate myself with mr. berry in practice, but at least my thoughts and sentiments are with him as he stands (many times alone) for local, economy and sensible harmony with nature over and against the socio-technological infrastructure of America's economy.

so with my rickety, head-turning lawnmower - today I salute mr. berry as he practices the way of Jesus:

"We learn from our gardens to deal with the most urgent question of the time: How much is enough?"

"If you grow a garden you are going to shed some sweat, and you are going to spend some time bent over; you will experience some aches and pains. But it is in the willingness to accept this discomfort that we strike the most telling blow against the power plants and what they represent."

"Every day do something that won't compute. Love the Lord. Love the world. Work for nothing...Love someone who doesn't deserve it...Plant sequoias...Practice resurrection."

Amen. Practice resurrection!